Let’s meet Lucy. She is a girl. A kindhearted and helpful girl. She always helps others when they’re in need no matter who they are. And every time she helps them she has one and only one expectation, that they share a positive relationship from them on. Whenever someone doesn’t hold up to these expectations, she feels a deep sense of sorrow. A sharp pain in her heart. She questions whether putting all this effort into helping someone was worth it. And that’s when everyone blames her. Tell her that it’s her fault she’s hurt.

Don’t blame others for disappointing you, blame yourself for expecting too much.

This quote has yet to make peace with me. For some reason I’ve never felt this quote as human. Yes, I said human. Expectation is nothing but anticipating or expecting an outcome based on common beliefs. Raise your hand if you go to a restaurant without expecting good food.Or a movie theatre without expecting at least a fun watch. Yeah, pretty sure all hands stayed down, hopefully out of agreement and not laziness.

I apply the same logic to people. When I help someone, I expect a general sense of gratitude. The person doesn’t have to become my slave for the rest of his/her life but will a thank you really hurt?? A general sense of positive mutual feeling is all I expect. But somehow if the person shuns me or doesn’t even bother to help me during my dark days, It’s my fault to even have expectations. How dare I feel tormented over the fact that the people whom I just helped, called me out for not doing enough or didn’t even try to help when they had the time.

I can see when this line makes sense. When you love someone and they don’t reciprocate it back or when you think someone is your Best friend but they don’t see you with the same light or expecting favors are scenarios in which the above quote makes sense. But in present day, it has become a symbol, or rather a statement for getting away with border line rude behaviour. As if the whole world is obliged to help them and listen to their commands. Why should a person feel guilty to expect human decency from someone?? Why should the person blame himself for expecting his friends to help?? How is expecting to not be taunted for helping, a sin?? That’s a sick and twisted attitude if you ask me.

It’s impossible to live this way. Everyone has expectations. It’s part of our human nature to have that emotion. And while expectations can lead to disappointments, that doesn’t mean we should stop expecting things from people and our lives. Sure, it hurts but it’s also a great way to determine who your true well-wishers are. People who truly care and are good. I don’t think expectations are outright bad. It’s important to expect but also important to realize when to stop expecting. Shutting it all out isn’t a solution, it’s just running from emotions. The key is in understanding at what point you should and you shouldn’t expect. Hopefully, one day we all will be enlightened enough to know it.

Thanks for reading.

4 thoughts on “Expectations

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